by The Last Honest Guy
I met this guy at school a few weeks ago. He is in a fraternity. He text me that same day, he was so sweet. He told me he is interested in me. We met up at school a few day later. We were flirting. I walked him to his car. In the parking lot, we were making out. It went a little too far. He would text me everyday. On Saturday, he invited me to hang out with his friends. I invited my friend to come along. He later told me we were going to play beer bong. He text me, that his friends doesn’t believe he has two hot girls. My friend didn’t want to go. We went to the movies instead. My friends think he now views me as slut. I wasn’t suppose to kiss him right away. He just wants sex. They tell me frat guys only want one thing. He stopped texting me. I text me. We always hang out in his car. We would make out. We hold hands. He tells me, he likes me. I text him a few days later, he didn’t respond. I am wondering, does he really like me? is he just using me? Should I continue to see him? (more…)
by The Last Honest Guy
Hi, there’s a guy I’ve been dating for almost 5 months now. We have a lot of background, ever since the day we met (almost 3 years now) he’s been interested in me. I was not interested at the time, he ask me to be his girlfriend a couple of times and I said no, in a gentle way. We kept talking, on and off for a period of time. During one of those offs he had a girlfriend with whom he was for only 2 months before she left him to go back to her ex. Months after that we started talking again, we got to know each other in a deeper lever and I decided to date him.
He told me one time, over the phone, he loved me, and asked me to go out for a family dinner. I felt we were moving really fast and said no, (and didn’t reply to his ‘I feel I love you’) after that he got a bit cold. I understood he probably felt I was going to leave him again, thing I didn’t planned on doing.
He started being really cold at times, and extremely interested in others. He was literally driving me nuts so we started getting into a lot of troubles, he told me he was no longer looking for a girlfriend. I figured out I had it deserved for acting like such a bitch sometimes. He continue dating, I knew he had feelings for me because I knew he had told his family and closest friend about us. We started to get intimate, and even though we kept talking like always (every day, all day) he no longer took me on dates or had details with me. I figured out that since he had what all guys are looking for he stopped caring about making a good impression. So I started acting like a bitch again. He had fights and since it did hurt me to feel like he didn’t care I said many times I wanted to end what he had. He always stayed calmed and said he did care, and that I needed to think things clearly. So we kept moving on. He at times acted extremely jealous, he even cried in front of me one time during a fight he thought I was seeing someone else… problem is, yesterday he said he was probably going on a date. I thought he was joking, I still don’t know for sure, he started getting into a fight and I told him I was not going to let that pass, and that it was not fair that he could see other people, he said I could do the same… That night I went out with some of our friends and a picture was taken of me and another guy, by the time I woke up I had many msgs saying that it was obvious that I cared, and that I was all lies and good bye.. he erased me before I had a chance to reply. I don’t know what is going on, if he had just one of those moments I tend to have so many times where I just want to end things because of jealousy, I don’t know if he only used it as an excuse to go out with someone else and not feel bad about it… btw, when we are good, we are great. and I always try to understand also the fact that his two girlfriends have cheated on him, and let go of the fact he may not want a girlfriend because he might have trust issues. I don’t know what to do anymore, I sent him two messages 1 explaining the night/picture, and another one saying I didn’t understand what was going on. Should I give him space or should I just move on already? I do care deeply for him. (more…)
by The Last Honest Guy
Dear Last Honest Guy,
I am going out with two guys who happen to be friends. Let’s call them Tom and Jerry. Tom and Jerry are both from the same culture (different from mine).
I first met Tom and he was at first vocal about his interest in me. We go out regularly but he has this bad habit of not keeping in touch. When we’re together though we always have a great time. He just has this one track mind and focuses only on what he has on his plate for the moment. Anyway, I’ve established that he doesn’t want to be my boyfriend and that is fine with me. He is graduating soon. I’m comfortable with the idea that I will only be seeing him for the duration of the time that he’s here.
Now Jerry and I met shortly after I met Tom. I would find out later that Jerry wanted to ask me out too. But since he didn’t, we got into this easy friendship. We talk daily. Recently however, Jerry asked me out. I thought about it and I am not averse to the idea. I figured since I am not committed to anyone, I am not accountable to anyone.
On one occasion however, Tom called me while I was out with Jerry. I would call him back later that evening and Tom never said anything about my going out with Jerry. On a second occasion, Tom called me and I told him I was out with Jerry again. This irritated him and soon after we talked about it.
You see, I have always been reasonable in dealing with relationships. I have told Tom pointblank that when he doesn’t keep in touch with me I feel so distant from him. I have noticed that he has been exerting more effort to keep in touch during the week after that talk. Anyway, he said he felt irritated that I went out but then he realized that he can’t expect anything from me that he can’t do himself. He said if he sees me once a week or if he gets to spend time with me when he can he is fine with that. He understands that I may need more time than that. So he said it is okay with me to go out with other people.
I thought he didn’t need to tell me that because I still go out with other people. After all, I don’t want to just keep waiting by the phone and wait for him to take me out when it is convenient for him.
Anyway, lately though Tom has exerted more effort to see me. Jerry on the other hand keeps trying to see me everyday.
I know I can’t keep this up. In the end I will have to choose. But I want to choose when I am comfortable and when I want to already. I admit I am more attracted to Tom than Jerry despite the easy friendship Jerry and I have. Otherwise I shouldn’t bother with Tom anymore when Jerry is so into me and wants to be my boyfriend.
However, in the grand scheme of things, these guys are transients in my life. This will not give me ‘forever’. Their culture has already determined that.
I feel like Jerry is more emotionally invested in me. I feel that should I decide to stop seeing Tom, Tom will be okay with it. Tom is used to being alone after all. And I’ve already determined that he can only be emotionally invested in me to an extent.
Last Honest Guy, am I being selfish if I keep seeing both of them? I don’t want to make a decision just yet. I admit I like the attention I am getting. However, I still have to figure out how I feel about both.
If I am to be wise about this I would just walk away and not choose either one of them at all. I think I am infatuated with Tom though. Yet I do care for Jerry.. and from the looks of how things are going I am not averse at the thought of him being my boyfriend. But I can’t quit on Tom just yet.
I am being fickle, am I not? Last Honest Guy, what do you think I should do?
I admit, other than these guys I also keep in touch with other people. But these two are the only ones I go out on dates with on a regular basis.
I don’t really know what to ask you. I just thought I would vent and get your POV. (more…)
by The Last Honest Guy
I met a guy through an online dating site. We had two great dates with absolutely no physical contact. On the third date he invited me over for dinner. After dinner we finally kissed. Due to icy roads, I ended up staying the night. We stayed up all night talking and eventually had awesome sex. Then again in the morning as well. He is one year divorced after his wife cheated and hadn’t slept with anyone… just beginning to date. Since that day we have seen each other but nothing physical and only in public. He says he really wants to take things slow and not jump into anyth but that his goal is a relationship. He is, of course still dating other people online. So, he calls or texts throughout the day and takes me out. He says he thinks I’m great. Do guys just keep a girl around for attention like girls do? There’s not even been a window for sex again, so I don’t think that’s his goal. Do guys really need to date around to know if they want to be serious with you? It’s not like I’m ready to marry the guy, but I think five dates is enough to know if you like someone or not, right? If he genuinely is interested but wants to go slow and keep options open, what’s the best way to approach him? (more…)
by The Last Honest Guy
So there was a survey done by no one else but Pantene, in case you don’t know, they’re the shampoo company. And this is what they found:
74% of men indicated that they notice women because of their (more…)
by The Last Honest Guy
I met this guy my first year in University. We talked via text messages for a while until I invited him over to hang out and watch a movie. We ended up sleeping together the second time he visited and slept together a few more times after that. I wanted a relationship, but he claimed to be too busy (he worked part-time, went to school full-time, and was part of a frat). We never went out on dates and he always came over to my place. I know, typical F Buddy status, so I stopped talking to him.
Fast forward, one year later, he ends up sending me a message via Facebook asking me how I’m doing and if I still have the same number. We exchange a few text messages over the course of one or two months, but lose touch again.
It’s now year 3, and we recently started talking again. He contacted me via Facebook IM one day and we started talking, just about general stuff. And then he told me that he missed me and that he wanted to see me. I spent so much time debating if I should let him come over or not because of our past, but finally gave in. We spent about 3 hours on my sofa just catching up on everything and then he started in on how he missed me and that he had screwed up when he let me go the first time and he wasn’t planning on losing me again. I ended up falling for this, and ended up in bed with him that night, and he stayed with me the whole night, something he never did before. He ended up coming over a few more times, always calling/texting the day of.
I got that, “maybe he’s just using me again vibe” and stopped talking to him for a while, always telling him that I had something going on and that I wouldn’t be able to see him. Yet again, he came, claiming that he missed me and that he had to see me. He’s been coming over a lot more lately, and actually making future plans with me for things like Valentine’s Day. Because I like to go back home on the weekends, we never get to hang out and he always sends me text messages asking me when I’ll be back, telling me he misses me and to come back already. Am I wrong to question his feelings for me or is he just using me? (more…)
