My boyfriend wants to video tape me giving him oral pleasure. I’m afraid that if I don’t he might go to some other female for his kinkiness. What do you advise me to do?

My number one rule is to never do anything you’re not comfortable doing. So my initial thought is an absolute, NO!

However, I do believe that at some point, if you’re in a long term relationship or marriage, there are going to be times where your partner might have certain sexual fantasies that need to be fulfill.

Let’s face it, you’re right. If you don’t fulfill those needs, there’s a strong possibility that he might find someone else that will. And to be fair, it’s a bit ridiculous to expect someone who has certain needs to go for the rest of their life without getting them fulfilled just because you refuse to take care of him that way.

At the same time, this is where you have to make a decision and think to yourself; how strongly opposed am I to this idea? Is this something I never want to do in my life? What am I afraid of? Can we compromise?

Another question that comes to mind is, why does he need a video of you giving him oral? The only a reason a guy would want this kind of video is because he wants to use it to masturbate when ever you’re not around.

Does this mean, you’re not giving him enough sex? Why else would he need a video?

To answer your question…

I would advise you to ONLY do this video if this is a long term relationship and is with someone who you know in your heart you will be together for a really long time. I’m talking about someone who you see yourself marrying.

I also advise you to talk to him and find out why he really wants to make this video. If he’s not getting enough sex, then you can just agree to have sex more often and maybe that will solve the problem.

If he says, he wants to watch it together with you before having sex just to get turned on (some people need that) then that’s perfectly fine and you can just tell him that you agree to do it but you get to keep the video and every time you come over you can bring it with you.

If this is a relationship where you know it’s only temporary and that’s why you’re hesitant to make this video, then I would advise you NOT to do it. Keep in mind that this might be the end of the relationship and you should prepare yourself for it.

I hope this helps and good luck.

UPDATE:

We’ve created a whole podcast episode dedicated to this topic. Please listen HERE and tell us what you think!