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There is just something about him that I can’t let go

My ex (27 year old) and I have been broken up for 7 months now. In this time, we have still been seeing each other, purely on a friends with benefits relationship. I was the first person to sleep with someone else, and I got called many names by him, as well as being asked never to contact him again. A short time afterwards we continued to see each other, and when he slept with someone else, it was the same deal. Afterwards, he told me we should stop seeing each other, yet sure enough a week later, we were once again sleeping together again. Lately, he has been really rude and disrespectful, trying to woo other girls on Facebook/text messages, and we have had numerous fights over this, all ending with one of us calling our arrangement off. After we had our first fight, a week later of completely NO CONTACT I got an apology. We had our last fight very recently and after two days, I once again received an apology. My question is, what is his problem? Is he literally sorry, or is he just being manipulative? Is his apologizing a way of keeping me in his life because he can’t let go? Or am I just being used until he finds something more with someone else? I know this is a bad place for me to be, both mentally and physically, but there is just something about him that I can’t let go, I need relationship advice.


First, stop thinking “there is just something about him that I can’t let go”, that’s nonsense. Let go and move on.

Second, you answered your own question but I guess you just need reassurance. He’s definitely just using you until he finds someone else. If he really wanted to be with you he would’ve already asked you to be his girlfriend and not just a friend with benefits.

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  • Purice Nichols

    The relationship sounds as though it isn’t going anywhere, and with each time you get back in good standing, there are even more fights, more problems…I don’t see where you both are compatible, just comfortable, to sort of speak…Even if you both were to move in today or even say “I do” tomorrow, things would never be any better, just get “no better, only worse”…I see him here as a man who are just in a “comfort zone” with you, and at any given point in “the game”, I am also seeing him using you as scapegoat whenever he feesl like playing on the board…..You appear smart, so YOU be the first to move on, tell him simply “Let’s just keep this friendly and civil in the future”, and find someone you don’t have to waste your time and life on “fighting with” or “fighting for”…Good luck, sweetie.

  • Nour Zak


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