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My husband has pictures of another girl on his computer…

My husband has pictures of another girl on his computer… post image

My husband and I have been married for over two years, and have been together for almost 7 years. I have always trusted my husband and we have been able to be honest about everything. Or so I had thought. Recently, I was loading digital pictures to the computer. When I was looking for the file to save them to, I came across a photo file labeled “stuff”. I clicked it and found several pornographic pictures. Now, this is not what I have the concern about. My husband has been honest about the fact that he looks at pornography. He even keeps his collection of Playboys on a bookshelf in our office. But, within this file was a file of non-pornographic pictures of women he knows. Some are co-workers of his, some are friends and there are even some pictures of his last serious ex girlfriend. Now, these are not old pictures. Some were saved as recently as last month ( I know this because they include pictures of a pregnant friend who just recently had her baby.) These are pictures that he has saved from their Facebook pages. I understand that some people often fantasize about people they know, but should I be concerned that he has a file of these photos? He has always told me that he was once cheated on by a girlfriend, so he would never cheat, but am I wrong to feel that this is a violation of trust, too? And how do I tell him that I know about this file. I have never felt the need to snoop through his stuff, but now I don’t know what to trust. I would love to hear your opinion of the situation. Thank you!

I wouldn’t say this is a violation of trust necessarily, I think that’s a bit of an exaggeration on your part. Think about it, do you really think he would just come out and tell you he has pictures of other women on his computer?

And if he did, what would be your response? Would it be; sure honey, no problem… good for you?

I don’t think so.

Look is very clear, your man obviously uses this pictures to masturbate and satisfy himself due to sexual fantasies or simply not getting enough sex in the bedroom. At times when you’ve been with a person for so long, sex can become a routine and often quite boring and yes there are ways to “spice things up” but are you really willing to do this? If it bothers you this much then maybe you should find ways to make sex exciting again.

I honestly think that he doesn’t want to cheat on you, so the next best thing to do is to just fantasize and wack off. Is there something wrong with that?

I mean think about it, what is a guy supposed to do when he finds other women attractive but loves his wife too much to cheat on her. Men don’t just stop liking other women just because they’re married and neither do women for that matter! So just be thankful that he only thinks about these women and not acts on it.

If you ever catch him trying to turn these fantasies into reality than you have something to worry about. At this point you have a man who loves you and doesn’t cheat.

Should you tell him you know about the pictures? I’m not sure what you’re trying to accomplish by questioning him. You might just embarrass him and make him be more careful next time and not get caught again. I really doubt he would just tell you he wanted to get off on them and instead you might just force him to lie to you and make something up.

If you really don’t have a good reason to question him, don’t do it. If you just want him to know that you know about the pictures that be prepare for a phony answer. What you should really use this information for is to just be aware of the girls he fantasizes about and make sure he doesn’t try to turn those fantasies into reality.

I hope that helps. Cheers!

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Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Miranda

    You truly don’t think this is like a precursor to cheating behavior with men?  Porn stars are “safe”.  We know the chances are one in a million of them ever being around a porn star on a daily basis the way they are with a co-worker.  Co-workers and friends though… I dunno.  I would also be concerned because increased accessibility to the person with mounting desires sounds like a recipe for trouble to me.  I do acknowledge, however, that even if confronted as nicely or cruelly as possible, the guy would just try that much harder to hide it, but still…

  • Lydia1

    A man must have written that answer!!!! Miranda I agree with you!

  • Sarahb1285

    my god this answer must have been written by a guy!!! do you really think a woman would find pics of co workers on her husbands computer and then think “oh dear, i must try harder and spice things up in the bedroom”?!!!!!” are you serious?!! this is just making the woman think that it is her fault, and which it certainly is not. it is the mans fault for not respecting his wife and seeing to her needs rather than to satisfy his own sck fantasies. pornography is one thing, but pictures of women he works with is crossinge line. what if the shoe was on the other foot and the woman was downloading pics of guys she knew???? bet the answer would be much different. why should the wife feel like its her fault just because she’s probably tired with kids and housework and is then trying to perform to the way her husband wants ibm the bedroom???? this answer by this dumb guy is as insensitive as her husband

  • The Last Honest Guy

    This answer must have been written by a guy??? Of course it is, the site is called The Last Honest! Who else would be writing the answers?
    Look, all men find other women attractive. You really think a guy gets married and just magically stops liking other women? The big difference is between the guys who only thinks about them and the ones who pursuits them. At this point we don’t have evidence of any cheating taking place.

  • Wendy

    He might just want to have pictures of his friends. Is it only women in this file or is it men too? Are there family pictures in the file? Or just women? If it’s just women, not good.

  • the truth

    Most older men suck at using computer and when they dont suck at it they are very unorganized im sure he just saved all his pictures to one file “stuff” and even me who is a women and happly in a relationship still have a picture of my ex in my computer somewhere. I spent a great amount of time with him and like to remember my past not forget it because i have a different partner. I dont even find my ex attractive anymore the picture is simply a milestone 

  • Zirah

    Thanks the last honest guy for being giving such an ‘in your face’ kind of comment to the questioner. Your name does reflect suitably in the manner of your writing. Let’s turn the table around, I dont see how it would have the same reaction if this was done by a women? 😉 some women do have their fantasies as well. We’re still are forgiving anyway of the lack of expertise in this area. Well we have to most of the time, since itll be putting them down 🙁

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