When talking to a girl, men are sometimes not sure whether the girl likes them and feels attracted, or perhaps, is just being nice and polite. In this post I will discuss the subconscious actions and hints women give men to show their attraction and interest. Paying attention to those hints can improve men’s communication and success with women.
People can achieve a rather good control of their verbal communication, i.e. they can choose what to say. However, as you’ve probably already read and heard, most of the human communication is not verbal, and is based on Tonality, Body Language, and other aspects of non-verbal communication. A person can tell any lie he wants, but when he’s connected to a lie machine – his pulse and sweat will almost always expose him.
In the same way, a girl can even tell you verbally that she is not interested and doesn’t like you, but her body language will tell you the opposite. Whenever a girl feels something towards you, she won’t be able to hide it.
In addition, a girl can even give you verbal hints that she likes you, but some men will not interpret it as signs of interest.
Women Rarely Show Direct Interest
Visible Signs of Interest
These are examples of visible and active signs of attraction women typically give to men:
- You began a conversation with a girl, let’s say in a bar, and the interaction develops. During the conversation, you can see the girl begins laughing. It’s kind of a childish laughter, and not related to any funny story or joke that you told her.
- You dance with a woman, look into her eyes, and she keeps eye contact for more than 3 seconds. In fact, eye contact is a sign of attraction.
- You are talking to a girl, suddenly her friend comes by and she went to talk with her. If she comes back to talk with you, it’s a strong sign of attraction.
- Her friends are calling her to come, and she responds with “just a moment”.
- A girl touches you without any reason, or even touches you “by mistake”.
- During your conversation, she asks you personal questions, such as “How old are you? Where do you live? What do you do?”, etc. Every attempt to know more about you is a sign of attraction.
- She smiles a lot.
- During the interaction with you, the girl begins Touching Herself – playing with her hair, fixing her clothes.
- The girl asks you questions that somehow involve your girlfriend (even if you didn’t manage any) or women in you life. She is actually trying to see if you are available or not.
In all the above examples, women are using indirect signs and body language to show their interest. Usually, women will use more than one sign. For example, a girl will smile to you while touching her hair.
It’s important to treat those signs seriously, because that is the way women communicate with men. Don’t just explain them as irrelevant by telling yourself “She is just interested where I work” or “She felt itchy in her ear”, because women will rarely give you direct signs.
In some cases when you will talk to women, you might not see any sure signs of attraction, either because she doesn’t use them or, more commonly, you won’t recognize them properly. I remember having a conversation with a girl in a bar for about 2 hours, without seeing any signs. I just couldn’t understand if she liked me or not.
However, let me tell you a secret – A girl will not just sit with you in a bar for 2 hours if she is not attracted to you.
- The fact that she chooses to spend her time with you, means that she has at least some interest in you.
- Another example: You are talking to a girl in a nightclub, and suddenly her friend goes to the bathroom. Usually, when a girl goes to the bathroom, her friend goes with her. If she stays with you, it’s a strong sign of attraction.
- You can check the girl’s reaction to you. Try, for example, to take her to a different place. If you are in a bar, tell her that you want to move to the side of the bar. If she follows you, it’s a sign of attraction.
- She feels comfortable with you physically. For example, you touch her hands and she doesn’t move them away, or you move closer to her and she doesn’t move away.
Passive signs are even more indirect, but yet, it’s signs that a girl is attracted and interested in you.
Women Complain about “Not Being Understood”
The most common complaint that women have about their relationships with men, is the feeling of “Not Being Understood”. In fact, it’s the same on the male side – men complain that they “Can’t Understand Women”.
One of the reasons why men don’t understand women, is because women rarely use direct language in their relationships with men.
Listening and paying attention to woman’s indirect messages and communication, such as the hints and signs that we discussed in the post, will help you understand women, and will help you give women the feeling of being understood.
Special Thanks to my friend Richard Liso for this great article:
Written by Richard Liso. In his personal Dating and Male Success Blog, he writes about his experience and methods to attract and date women.