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He said I am childish and immature and that I don’t listen to what he’s saying

He said I am childish and immature and that I don’t listen to what he’s saying post image

Hi,

So I am born and raised in the Philippines and I met this 38 year old guy who is born and raised in Iran. He has been in the US for 9 years during which he has been away from his parents and siblings. We have been dating for 3 weeks now and on the first week, everything was great. His parents arrived from Iran and he even introduced me to them. Then he became busy though we maintain communication each day and we still see each other twice a week. Two nights ago, we had an argument and he said I am childish and immature and that I don’t listen to what he’s saying. After that he completely ignored me and didn’t want to talk. Being the childish person I am, I even asked if he was already breaking up with me and he said “No.” But he stopped texting and calling since then. I messaged him last night on ym just to say hi and good night and he just replied with the same things.

My question is, what do I do now? Are we still dating or is it time to move on like nothing happened? I am so clueless.

Thanks

Answer from The Last Honest Guy

The decision to move on or to stay is something that you need to figure out on your own.

You must first ask yourself:

Are you willing to put up with this kind of behavior from a grown man?

How does it make you feel when he acts this way?

Are you willing to chase after a guy and beg him every time he acts out this way?

Quite frankly, personally I would not put up with someone who behaves that way.  If you really feel like you’re NOT acting childish or immature then it would get very annoying to have someone constantly tell you those things with out a reason.

Another thing to keep in mind is that middle eastern men tend to be very traditional when it comes to relationships. They tend to want women to behave the way they used to 100 years ago. In other words, they want a women that listens to what a man has to say and just shuts up.

I’m not trying to bash on middle eastern men, there are some that can be understanding to a woman’s needs but at the same time there is majority of them that still have the old way of thinking. It’s part of their culture and something that’s very hard to change, and at 38 years old  I doubt you’ll be able to do.

Just keep in mind what you’re getting yourself into and make a conscious decision about this. For the sound of your questions it doesn’t seem like you’re very happy about it and that should raise a red flag. If you don’t like it now, I doubt you’ll like it later.

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  • Wendy

    Nobody in their 30’s would say,  “I met this 38 year old guy”   so  I’m guessing you are way younger, which might be the problem. Date guys closer your own age, you have plenty of time to grow up. I am also concerned with you calling yourself childish, when you said “Being the childish person I am”… Did you believe yourself to be childish before you met him, or did you internalize his bull crap? Most men don’t want somebody childish (immature), but they do want a woman who is “child-like.” (happy, makes jokes, and likes to have a good time). Being child like also makes men feel like somehow they are your protector, and they love that. This 38 year old guy you dated is a douche. Thank god he did you a favor by leaving. You should throw a Party! Enjoy your life, you can grow up when you want to… or never:) Namaste.

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